Ordination and Lamentation

January 15, 2021 Irwin Keller

Screenshot by Lisa Rüth.

Laying of hands. Screen shot by Lisa Rüth.

Laying of Hands. Drawing by Arielle Breeze Jorgensen.

Streaming in Wilmette, Illinois. Photo by Helene Rhodes.

Streaming on Sonoma Mountain. Photo by Beth Field.

After years, months, weeks, days of anticipation, I was ordained as a rabbi last Sunday, wearing a tallit that had belonged to my beloved lifelong rabbi, Mark S. Shapiro. The next day, the world lost Steve Shapiro – his son and my friend.

Late Season

September 5, 2020 Irwin Keller

And there it was. My unspoken conviction that all fruition must come before age 60, while I'm still young in my own estimation. That if I didn't achieve whatever on some timeline, then I'd failed, and I might as well give it up. I sat there and laughed at myself, willing to deny my future self all sorts of fulfillment and joy, just because I thought 60 was too old.

Isolation, AIDS Flashbacks, & Divine Embrace

May 2, 2020 Irwin Keller

There are pieces of this isolation I want to remember and bring with me when we are finally able to move freely about the cabin. But I also know that this isolation, no matter how pleasant parts of it may be, is something we will all need to reckon with over time. Because there is injury in going so long not touching and not being touched! Noticing and having to ignore the skin’s desire to feel skin, our bones’ desire to be pressed in an embrace.

Irwin, My Tocayo

December 9, 2019 Irwin Keller

I was still in the batter's box when Ancestry tossed me a reference to that Isaak Keller, clearly him, with the right birthdate and the right parents. The document Ancestry had found was a death record. 1942. Dachau.

Discontinuity, and a German Cemetery

November 15, 2019 Irwin Keller

When I stood at that cemetery on that rainy hilltop, I felt seen. Not that I in particular was foreseen, but that the possibility of me had been contemplated.